things i love thursday

.strawberry sparkling wine.
.new girl friends.
.falling over laughing.
.taylor swift.
.facetiming my family (tear).
.angela aki.
.pineapple anything.
.good hand lotion.
.tights with stars.

stuck

well, i WAS doing well
(blogging close to everyday too)
until my whole life blew up in my face.

things are stressful
my stomach is constantly in knots
i have close to zero appetite
i miss my family and am still in shock,
how did i get here?
where do i go from here?
and HOW do i go anywhere?

funny how the fear of being left
turns boys simultaneously into
sweethearts and jerks and how
true girl friends will tell you
what you already know is true
you just don't want to believe
because it's easier not to.

the only things that saved christmas
was coming home tispy on the 25th
and facetiming with my family
while they finished christmas morning
brunch and then opened presents.

i sat on the side table
or where ever they put the ipad
and i felt, for a few moments,
like i was almost even there.

otherwise, i didn't "do" christmas this year
which leaves next year in prime
"better than last year" position.

a girl's gotta try to be optimistic, right?

things i love thursday

.cabbage with sesame oil and salt.
.hot lemonade.
.drinks with good friends.
.meeting nice people.
.my coworkers.
.being recklessly spontaneous.
.raspberries for lunch.
.only four more days of work til vacation.
.looking at houses/apartments and dreaming.

a farewell weekend

here's a list of the things that were keeping me from posting:

1 liter of tanrei
4 (or 5, or 6?) white peach sours
3 bottles of smiroff ice (the red one)
2 (or 3?) shots of jager
a glass or two of moet champagne
and a gaggle of gay boys in ni-chome.

also noteworthy:
some unbloggable moments (yikes)
a very fuzzy memory
a threesomething AM cab ride
puking in front of a fancy hotel
sleeping (er, passing out?) for 3 hours
a seriously debilitating hangover (makes top 3, easily.)
on a regular day of work
plus a kids' christmas party (had to be santa, too)
then round two of drinking
visiting old haunts
and seeing old friends
saying goodbye to a dear friend
and crying more than was probably necessary

all in all, quite the weekend.

i hadn't been out clubbing in over 2 and a half years
(no need to double check your math, it's no accident...)
and i'm proud (or embarrassed) to report i haven't lost my touch.
i fell all over the dance floor while laughing and apologizing
but lucky for me someone seemed interested enough to catch me!


and, more importantly, in those few hours, i had not a care in the world.


yeah, reality's a bitch, ain't it?

monetary validation

my day started with breakfast at noon because that's when i was finally able to pull myself out of bed and to the table. then i suddenly remembered my bonus furikomi so i checked my bank account online, and i was all at once very happy and also suspicious/shocked. was i doing the math right?

my november paycheck and my bonus were furikomi-ed in one lump sum and since i get paid hourly (and haven't gotten my paper pay stub yet) i'm not exactly sure what my november pay total is. but i know it can't be much different than october. definitely not more than october because i worked 4 halloween parties on top of my regular load. so, i subtracted my october pay total from the amount and...wha?! really?!!

we'd been told, "while things have been really good for the last couple months, bonuses will be based on the whole year of 2011." with the earthquake and everything (we were hit really hard when people left japan and/or tokyo and withdrew from their classes) and so i wasn't getting my hopes up because i saw the graph. i knew how much and for how long we were in the red, but...wow, what a pleasant surprise.

granted i worked my ass off this year. it was definitely not an easy year. lots of tears, sweat and frustration. it's the most rewarding job i've ever had, and loving my job as much as i do alone is enough to continue, but validation in the form of cold hard cash helps too! haha. yes, merry christmas to ME!!!

things i love thursday

.(japanese) high school friends' beautiful weddings.
.good lighting for photos.
.cleaning out the mountain of clothes in my closet.
.new arm warmers and a big warm scarf.
.getting facetime-d by my parents.
.yakitori.
.anzushu.
.encouraging blog comments (thank you!).
.bonus comes tomorrow.

a year

(please excuse any foul language in this post...advanced apologies)


looks like things are gonna get a lot worse before they get better.
i always thought you could do anything for a year...

you know, even if whatever it was sucked,
you could always last a year?

apparently i was wrong.
fucking a.


anyone looking to rent a room in yokohama starting in january or february?

oh, that's rhetorical, btw.  i'll either enjoy the extra space or find a friend.
though i'm pretty sure it'll be enjoy the extra [literal and figurative] space.

well, probably only a very small part of my heartbroken self will...

*sigh*

tangerine tango

while shopping at the mall the other day, i offhandedly picked up a big chunky knit scarf in a unusual-for-me-color at forever 21 that seemed like a good alternate to the i-wear-you-every-single-day fine knit grey scarf that i, well, wear every day.

then yesterday, in my daily eye-candy-interior-design-diy-blog-reading, i found out that pantone announced the color of the year for 2012. yep, me and my trendy scarf, ahead of the curve! ;)

japanese wedding = lots of yennies

i went a friend's wedding on saturday.

it was *absolutely* beautiful.

the weather was sunny with perfect blue skies,
the chapel/reception location was a castle,
(not really but might as well have been!)
the bride was stunning, the groom was smitten,
it even made me wedding daydream a bit until i heard
from another, recently married, friend of the bride
the price tag on a wedding like my friend's...

￥4,000,000 (!!!!)





(i'll give you a few moments to pick your jaw up off the table)





sadly, your eyes are indeed seeing 6 zeros.
with a little current-exchange-rate math,
that turns into over $51,000. yikes!

so yeah, the bbq in the backyard of my parents' house? eloping?
sounding better and better every minute.

oops.

falling behind already - didn't even make it half way through december...

may have to find some interesting somethings to post about and double post.

but since it's 2:30am, i don't imagine anything interesting will come out now

except that facebook tetris is *horribly* addicting. theendgoodnight.

a little christmas shopping

i bought Ro's christmas presents today. (i would say what, but i have this paranoid suspicion that he has found my blog and don't want to ruin the surprise!)

anyway, they are very much of the practical type, and it seems like a waste to wait until christmas to actually give them to him. but, since christmas IS only two weeks away, i guess it's not too much to wait.

my goal of going to the mall was to get one of those shoulder shrug/mini jacket things for the weddings i'm going to tomorrow and this is how it went: i went in for A and came out with the whole alphabet! :P

things i love thursday

.getting a head start on end-of-the-year (work) cleaning.
.gummy bears.
.mornings or evenings at home to myself.
.tetris on facebook (so addicting!).
.okonomiyaki.
.riding bikes through yokohama, at night, laughing.
.kid hugs.
.salad with avocado, tofu, chicken and veggie vinegar dressing.
.vaseline (it's dry out there!!).
.my students on their good days.

hump day

so i'm 9 minutes late (shoot me)
and should have been in bed
about an hour and 9 minutes ago.
the sleep deprivation continues...

today was a long day.
and tomorrow is another long day.
i finish one thing but there's always
another one just waiting for me,
but it'll be friday (my day off!) soon,
followed by two weddings on saturday.

speaking of weddings, the dress i ordered
for my brother's wedding?  wrong color!
the bride told us all one color
but the color she was looking at
was actually a different color name.

living in japan, i don't think i feel
the full extent of the "drama"
(because i'm sure there is some happening!)

but i think it'll all work out in the end.
(buy second dress, wait for first dress to arrive,
send first dress back, get reimbursed, etc etc.)
geez, weddings are stressful and i'm not even the bride!


makes you reconsider the whole wedding thing...hmmm

lunch break curiousities

where exactly are full time fashion bloggers going in their fancy outfits?

why are heels so uncomfortable and uggs so warm and comfortable?

is there a recipe for a yummy umeboshi and pork dish out there?





*yes, my mind really is filled with these ridiculous things
and i actually wrote them in an email and sent it to myself.
i forsee this becoming a very (or not very) funny series of posts.

quote of the day

"While it's often fashionable to dwell upon what might have been, what's usually overlooked is that really and truly, it couldn't have.

Because, invariably, any romanticized versions of how things "might have been," are based upon fictionalized versions of the past.

You see, most of the time when people think the present could have been different than it is, it's because they think the past was different than it was."

-the Universe



deep.

the 2011 list: october & november

2. create an actual inspiration board
does my pinterest addiction count?

9. continue ds budget book
i was really really slack about this for the last two months.  i put in the bare minimum of my receipts, and updated it to match the amount of money i actually have right now, so the "spent in october" and "spent in november" numbers are a bit off, but at least it's not a total flop.

13. get rid of clothes/shoes i don't wear (once in spring, once in fall/early winter)
yeah, i would say it's about time this happens.  if i still have a box of clothes to be "donated" at the end of december, i'm putting it in writing: i will throw the whole box away.  i am such a horrible "saver" but it's gotta stop!

22. try a new recipe at least once a month
i'm pretty sure i did this.  at the very least i made pretzel crusted chicken and pumpkin pie crust, which was a first.

26. go to a concert/performance/show
i saw a poster for the nutcracker ballet in town.  must look closer at where and when and buy self ticket.  may just go alone!!  

30. save money (starting goal of 60,000yen per month, average)
i didn't think i did it, according the my DS budget book numbers, but we just balanced our "accounts" and Ro is going to transfer some money to my account, which will mean i saved over 60,000yen times 2! (each month i pay rent and utilities, he pays internet, phones and most of the grocery shopping and then we calculate the difference and the person who owes pays the other person.)

35. have a pumpkin carving party
did this and it was great!!  we had about 10 pumpkins and at least that many people come by over the course of the afternoon/evening. i need to do more planning in the way of food/a meal and drink next time, but definitely want to do it again next year!

36. host thanksgiving
Style and his girlfriend hosted this year.  i really wanted to have it at our place, but i took lots of [my favorite thanksgiving] food and it was a success (despite serious doubts on my part). plus, not having to put my hand inside a raw turkey kind of makes the not hosting thing alright in the end. we'll see what happens next year.

37. send new year's cards in december to arrive on time
probably need to be on top of this, since it's december already and i haven't even THOUGHT the word "nengajo" yet.  

may bridesmaid

my older brother is getting married in may.
it breaks down kinda like this:

older brother                                 fiancé
younger sister (me)           younger sister
younger brother             younger brother

plus three friends on either side and suddenly
you've got yourself a 10 person wedding party.

i've never been *in* a wedding before,
(though i have been to a handful of japanese weddings,
er...ceremony/receptions/2nd party/some combination)

and since i've missed all my american friends' weddings,
(living japan, you are a such a pain sometimes)
i'm looking forward to a good ol' american wedding.

plus, i think my brother's fiancé is great. (always helps!)

so, the fiancé chose pretty gray silk chiffon dresses from jcrew.
there are four different styles; we can each pick the one we like.

and yet again japan, you are such a pain: i hate online shopping.
i so badly want to actually TRY THE DRESS ON.

i picked the size that "accomodates" the biggest measurement
(which is not the bust, and in hindsight, maybe i should have worried
about the bust and waist more, considering the style? and does anyone
even match ALL three of the bust:waist:hip measurements exactly?!)
according to their size chart, but i'm still nervous it won't fit.

i double checked their return policy, so worst case scenario,
i have to ship it back for an exchange, but i just ordered this:

hopefully it fits well enough (or perfectly!?) or can at least be tailored...

and now, shoe ideas?

december

i decided yesterday that my blog was such a debbie downer.
sure there are things i love thursday posts, but everything else
that has come out recently, is a rant or a frustration or a "blah."

i'm attempting to fix this (not because i think i have to apologize
for being on the blue side lately, but because it even makes *me*
cringe when i pretend to be reading my own blog for the first time.)
and am going to try to blog once a day for the month of december.
not only is december a crazy crazy month anyway, i'm throwing
this one top!  yep, serial overscheduler with achievement issues. ha!

anyway, maybe it'll get me out of my nobloggingmojowhatsoever funk.

i think maybe i should start drinking wine or umeshu when i blog, too. 
that might make things a little more fun and festive and...gasp...happy? ;)

the tree

here she is!

i still have lofty goals of making a tree skirt and finding/making some kind of star topper.  i imagine it'll just end up being exactly like this until january 4th* though!  but you know, for a "first tree," i'll still be quite happy if it only ever looks like this.  :)


*Ro made me promise that i would actually take it down at some point and so it can only stay up until i go back to work after the new years holiday.

things i love thursday

.amy grant christmas album.
.making origami cranes.
.root beer.
.lululemon arm warmers.
.my christmas tree(!!!!).
.going to bed early.
."free" dinners (congratulatory work party).
.pretzels and chocolate.
.heater at work = i don't freeze on my lunch break.

right now

it used to be that i blogged when life was "too much." it was my creative outlet. lately life has been too much to even blog. and at the same time, i'm at a standstill. i struggle to pull myself out of bed every morning (though i'm sure the cold is mostly to blame). i smile and sell my foreignness, my english, my enthusiasm, my energy in return for laughs and hugs every day. i come home and bite my tongue while i futilely try to enjoy the right now. but time passes, almost unnoticed. in the end, what's another day?

thanksgiving was a surprising success. as i walked in the door, the host thanked me for everything i brought and verbally recognized that when i was the host last year, i did everything. that was all the validation i needed. the turkey turned out fabulous so obviously i feel ridiculous for getting so upset about it, in hindsight. plus, no one showed up terribly hungover and only Ro seemed to be somewhat out of spirit. he didn't lift a cooking finger and got a gourmet meal in return. i ignored his childishness.

i put up my christmas tree yesterday. mine because *i* bought it, *i* bought all the lights and ornaments and *i* put it up. lazy boy. he likes the result, but was not at all interested in helping. hmph. whatever, i was sick (classic cold this time around) and felt like shit, but i blasted some christmas amy grant, circa 1983, and think i might have even enjoyed it more than if i he *had* helped. it's perfect and lights up our living room so beautifully.

am still sick today, but managed a day at work (thankfully my saturdays are short) and all that's lingering is a horrible headache. is 8pm too early to go to bed?

things i love thursday

hello friday.



.instant coffee with a splash of milk and caramel syrup(!!!).
.making origami cranes.
.taylor swift.
.big warm scarves.
.tsubaki hair treatment.
.having a poinsettia in the living room.
.days off.
.finding cranberries and canned pumpkin in tokyo.
.friends pulling through and surprising you.

on thanksgiving (and other similar occassions)

i am having serious "delegation" issues.

tomorrow is our thanksgiving.
the thanksgiving i wanted to host.
the thanksgiving that Style and his girlfriend,
with a swift, "we're doing thanksgiving," decided on.

so, i couldn't play host, i did the next best thing: i called dibs on mashed potatoes and cranberry dressing. i suggested Bee bring salad (he makes a mean balsamic vinaigrette dressing). he said he'd do that and mini pumpkin pies. then S and GF said they'd "have their hands full with the turkey." so the green bean dish the GF talked about? not happening, i guess.

i hate to be an unthankful bitch, but when i hosted thanksgiving last year, i did everything except the drinks. that would be the turkey, stuffing, mashed potatoes, green beans, cranberry salad, mini pumpkin pies, and tea. i asked people to bring 1000yen to offset the costs and S brought the wine. i WANTED to cook it. i wanted to pull it all off in a tiny japanese kitchen. maybe it was to prove something to myself. anyway...

yesterday, two days before the event and Bee doesn't have pumpkin. AND giving the excuse he's been super busy this week and hasn't had time to do anything AND has a wedding tonight of a college friend (read: lots and LOTS of drinking) so the number of dishes he actually makes will depend on tonight's festivities.

need i remind myself, he cancelled last minute last year? i don't know what's worse, him coming and being totally hungover or not coming at all...

(i'm sick of shitty friends. and by that i mean, i'm sick of caring about friends more than they care about me. i look forward to these "events" so much and when others don't, it feels personal. i know it's not. i KNOW it isn't, but god it feels like it. ugh, why am i crying?)

anyway, so not only do i not get to host, the people who ARE hosting aren't even making the majority of the food! so i have to haul my ass and all the food i'm making to their place. (granted, i offered AND i want to, but now it's beginning to feel like if i DON'T, there's gonna be turkey and wine. yeah, happy thanksgiving...)

then GF posted on facebook a couple hours ago that the turkey arrived. i commented, "i assume it's not frozen? can't wait to sit on your new sofa and eat that sucker! haha" and GF writes that they're "thawing it now." um, did you BOTHER to check on thawing a turkey?! they take a couple DAYS!!! i emailed Style and said they recommend 2-3 days and he replied, "yeah i suspected as much. well, we will sort it out tomorrow."

ahhhhhh!!!!!!

the micro-manager in me is having a FULL. BLOWN. FREAK. OUT.

seriously?!!!

no, really....seriously?!!

and yes, i realize it's totally irrational to get upset about something so "trivial" as a turkey and for god's sake, it's THANKSgiving, i should be thankful. but i'm pissed and frustrated and their lack of...planning? or caring? i mean, maybe it'll turn out fine and food will get made and hauled and people will be pleasant and food will be delicious and we'll all talk and be merry and be thankful for everything we have, and maybe it'll be fine. but damn, i hate delegating for this very reason: because it just sets me up to be completing and utterly disappointed in people. people that i care about, but that seem to have other things more important than me. and i know it's not "me" per se, that maybe thanksgiving just doesn't mean as much to them as i've made it mean to me. and i can't blame them for having different values and different priorities. but if you don't care THAT much, why take it on? don't volunteer to play host if you don't want to cook more than one thing (we're taking a bottle of wine but Style and GF better have something in the way of drinks), don't say you'll make something, if you aren't gonna even show up in the end (i'm calling it now: Bee is too hungover to even get out of bed tomorrow, little bitch.)

and then i wonder if maybe this is all just part of me learning to let things go? how do you know when it really is just you being too "uptight" or "possessive" or when it's okay to fight for it because it means THAT much to you?




p.s.
here's what i'm making/taking:
mashed potatoes
cranberry salad (my mom's recipe - it's not thanksgiving without it)
mini pumpkin pies
frosted sugar cookies (i really like making these, so, only if i time)
dinner rolls (store bought)
a bottle of wine

things i love thursday

only 15 minutes late...



.homemade cornbread and chili.
.being the bigger person.
.sappy movies.
.down comforters.
.yummy lotion.
.new toothbrushes.
.minimizing the "luggage" i take to work.
.the color of tokyo winter skies.
.being halfway through a 6-day week.

things i love thursday

.the "you sneaky mom!" video that's going around.
.gorillaz (esp. empire ants).
.mini meatloaf.
.perfect, needed i love yous (that break your heart).
.finally getting on top of (a couple) things at work.
.music that helps you just get through it all.
.dinosaur sugar cookies, frosted green.
.tights and uggs.
.tomorrow is 11.11.11 (yes, i'm a number nerd).

things i love thursday

.that all the halloween parties at work are OVER.
.hot lemonade (this, but from costco).
.laughing 'til your stomach hurts.
.planning my 1st annual christmas tree decorating party.
.big fluffy down slippers (bring it on, winter!)
.homemade sugar cookies (already had 3 by lunch).
.my half of the "office" being clean (for once!).
.justin bieber's mistletoe (yeah, it's true).
.NEW&HUGE bookshelf (finally all my books will have a home!).

quote of the day

"...sometimes when you've had a difficult day, or met difficult people, been let down, disappointed, or heartbroken, it's easy to completely forget the most important thing of all... you're alive."

-the universe



(seems somehow appropriate on the birthday of a family friend who took his life just a few months ago.)

things i love thursday

i was out riding my bike today and it occurred to me i hadn't done this this week:



.hot tea & homemade cupcakes.
.slippers behind the front desk at work.
.indian summer days.
.toys arriving at work (to sell) feels like christmas.
.ikea hack brainstorming.
.getting my voice back.
.dinner with old friends.
.pinterest browsing.
.riding my bike and not getting lost.

if i didn't actually need you...

it's been a rollercoaster these last few weeks.
i don't know where it's heading, but i know that
i have no where else to go but right where i am.

i've been working my ass off (yeah, what's new, right?)
and we finally met our fall campaign number this week.
i was going to be devastated if we didn't after every-
thing we've been through in the last nine long months.

plus, despite getting my tonsils taken out and being careful
and staying relatively healthy, the throat issues continue.
i am losing my voice, again. so i forced myself to the doctor
today and got more medicine - the same stuff i got at the end
of august, but we're one man short at work and everyone else
is battling colds right now, so time off is hard to come by.

but if i can't sing, much less talk, i can't exactly work.
it's so frustrating because i feel fine except for my voice...

basically, it's *all* just so f'ing frustrating.

sigh.

things i love thursday

yeah yeah, it's friday.



.family mart spaghetti (lunch every.day.).
.honey wheat bagels with cream cheese & jelly.
.getting a yokohama gentei starbucks mug.
.snow cones (yes, even in october).
.new hat (actually more brown than yellow).
.scarf weather.
.watching cnn.
.dishes, laundry, vacuum, all CHECK.
.a well earned paycheck.

things i love thursday

hello again, friday.



.carving pumpkins with friends.
.baked pumpkin seeds.
.nashi (asian pears).
.leaving work "early" (which actually just means on time).
.irohas orange flavored water.
.getting 12 hours of sleep.
.finally not missing trash day.
.owning a christmas tree (AH, CAN'T WAIT!).
.coming home to the smell of dinner.

things i love thursday

i even started this post on wednesday
with hopes i'd make it on thursday. meh.



.bagels and butter.
.halloween pumpkins(!!!).
.stamps (the ink kind).
.calendar shopping (yes, it's early; i ♥ calendars).
.english tv.
.when the music just "fits".
."salon" smelling hair products.
.figuring out how to make the work computer do what i want.
.toasted english muffin peanut butter and jelly sandwiches.

the 2011 list: september

9. continue ds budget book 
i'm two months behind.  sigh.

13. get rid of clothes/shoes i don't wear (once in spring, once in fall/early winter)
i think it's technically fall now...uh oh.

14. wear a dress or skirt 4 times a month
check.  (summer skirts + textured tights! long skirts with t-shirts! loving it.)

30. save money (starting goal of 60,000yen per month, average)
in the last 7 months (since moving, which was a huge setback for my bank account) i have saved way over 60,000yen a month, on average.  not that me being a "hoarder" of all things, including money, is something new by any means.  but, i am actually quite proud of myself.  i haven't gone on any "big" trips, so that helps, and though i haven't "denied" myself things i really really wanted (fruit that's always a bit on the expensive side or caramel frappuccinos or a new hiking backpack or a few new clothes here or there) i am pretty frugal and have managed to save a nice chunk of money over the last 6 months or so.

35. have a pumpkin carving party
bought the pumpkins today (5 pumpkins at 998yen a piece at costco on 9/30) and invited the people.  pumpkins + people = party!


on an rare side note to my list post: i think this year's list became a bit too irrelevant.  obviously i should have changed it to make it more relevant, but the truth is, i'm not that fussed either way.  it feels a bit like wasting time that could be used toward completing more "appropriate" goals by not updating it but oh well.  things at work didn't go exactly like we envisioned (see March 11th and other unexpectinged news) which basically has meant more/longer/exhausting work days sandwiched between days off where changing out of my pajamas is sometimes too much effort.  i haven't turned on my sewing machine in months, my etsy shop has been emtpy for even longer, my creativity is zero and while i love my job and it's very rewarding and it feels like exactly what i should be doing, it's kind of been the "theme" of my year.  work.  work.  and more work.  unfortunately it's likely going to continue to be for at least 2 or 3 more months, which is why revamping my list now seems pointless.  we'll talk next year when it comes and try not to dwell too much on my completely un-completed 2011 list.  shit happens, right?

things i love thursday

oh, hello again, friday.



.orange irohas water.
.onsens and green in west kanagawa.
.the dessert set at 五右衛門.
.black thunder (like a chocolate covered oreo bar).
.saving money.
.turning summer skirts to fall outfits.
.sleeping in.
.possibly getting cable.
.therapeutic cries.

things i love thursday

i should just have these posts to be a friday thing. ha.



.my new work schedule.
.dinner and drinks with coworkers.
.typhoon = half day.
.the cool(er) weather.
.blue skies.
.adele album, 21.
.going back to sleep on days off.
.kalua milk.
.chicken curry a la Ro.

bloggers these days

oh so i remembered what i was going to write...

i hate how bloggers get famous and all of a sudden start charging money for things they used to post for free.  i've noticed it recently on a couple blogs i frequently read.  i understand that these bloggers are blogging to make a living, but it's frustrating that the very things that made them popular (and famous) are just becoming one more money making scheme.  i don't know how much sponsorship and advertising brings in, but as far as actual blog content, it seems really...snotty? cheap (in the punch-below-the-belt kind of cheap)?...to stop blogging certain posts and putting them into money-required forms.

sigh.  i guess that's just the reality of the blogging world these days?

there are days i wish i had a thousand followers (or, i should say, a blog actually worthy of having a thousand followers - ha!) but when i see the "business" side take over, i'm glad i'm just a little lowly blog floating around out in cyberspace.

i guess if the original goal of the blog was to eventually be a content-for-purchase venture, it just required "giving it away" to get readers to become readers who would be willing to pay for that content...?  then the free stuff was just a stepping stone to achieving the actual goal?

eh, i dunno.

i'll still read those blogs, but it sort of taints my feelings toward the blogger.  not that it's any loss for them i'm sure, since there are probably hundreds (if not thousands?!) of people who are willing to pay for the same stuff they were getting for free just a year ago, but not me.  yeah, go ahead and call me stingy or selfish or stubborn, it wouldn't be the first time for any of those.  ha!

cleaning lady

and it's only two o'clock.



post script: i may or may not have
taken an hour "lunch" break to eat
three snowcones.  but only maybe.  ;)

things i love thursday

.making concrete moves on a long held dream.
.surprise postcards from Ro (from vietnam).
.a new work schedule = 2 on 1 off 3 on 1 off (it's good so far).
.things, overall, going well at work (despite being down a man).
.cool breezes at night.
.rediscovering clothes in my closet.
.150yen earrings that i love much more than 150yen.
.the moments just after taking your contacts out after a long day.
.good numbers at work = needed motivation/confidence boost.

midnight dinner

i should be eating dinner since i got home almost an hour ago (at 10:20pm...sigh.)
and have yet to make any effort in the meal department.
but i wonder if now i'm just so far past being hungry that i should just go to bed.

mornings have been rough the last couple days.
i wake up tired every morning with the stiff neck or sore legs
(like i ran a couple miles, though i haven't) or sore eyes.

will try closing the windows tonight and just keeping the fan on.
maybe it's the outside noises that's not letting me get actual good sleep?

there was something i was going to write about.
i think it was a rant about something.
but, yeah, i forget what it was.
i think that means it's time to go to sleep.

cereal for dinner it is.

brought to you by the letter J

pulling a laminated card with a map of japan out of a bag, me:
おーこれ何？ooooh, do you guys know what this is?

six 3-5 year olds:
ちずー！

me:
that's right!  ちずだね。何のちず？a map of...?
then, half talking to the moms and dads around the room,
まだ知らないのかな... (the parents laugh)
Okay, let's look!

4 year old girl, pointing to a dot labeled "Tokyo":
「Tokyo」って書いてある!

me:
Wow!  今読めたの？！Good job, that's right! It says 'Tokyo.' Okay, what's this say?

kids:
...

me:
It says "Osaka."

3 year old boy:
じゃ、これは？

me:
It says 'Fukuoka'.

5 year old boy:
これは？！

me:
Umm... 'Sa. Po. Ro. Sapporo!

3 year old girl:
これは？

me:
Akita.

circling Japan with my finger again,
So, what is this?

3 year old boy:
えっ、綱島は*？

me:
えーとね、「つなしま」はのってないね…

(parents laugh again)

another 3 year old boy:
ねぇ、東京行ったことあるよ！

me:
really? でもね、今東京にいるよ。あははは〜
one more try circling Japan on the card,
Okay, really, what's this??

kids:
...

me:
it's JAPAN!!
(more parent laughing)

kids:
...?

me:
そう、これは日本だよ。

kids:
...
(minds are totally being blown...)

me:
日本はね、英語でJAPANって言うよ。

kids:
なんで？

me:
え？なんで？日本は英語で「Japan」というから。
これは日本の地図だよ。Can you say 'Japan?'

kids:
...Japan!


me:
yes, and 'Japan' starts with...?

(holding up big foam "J")

kids: JJJJJJJaaaaaaaaaayyyyy!!!!


(i think we're making progress...)




*Tsunashima is the name of the station where, I assume, the little boy lives.  it's like looking at a map of the US with New York, LA and Washington DC labeled and someone asking where AnySmallTown, USA is.  it was super cute.

the 2011 list: august

remember when i used to do these on the last day of the month? yeah, when i had blogging mo-jo and wasn't falling asleep on the couch at 9:30pm...ha.

2. create an actual inspiration board
pinterest will have to do this time around.

6. climb mt. fuji
did it twice this summer. double check.

9. continue ds budget book
am still playing catch-up. finished july a couple weeks ago. august receipts are still waiting...

14. wear a dress or skirt 4 times a month
did easily. it's still very much hot summer skirt weather.

22. try a new recipe at least once a month
i made some kind of pork/eggplant/tomato "summer-y" dish a few weeks back. don't think i have a link for it though.

30. save money (starting goal of 60,000yen per month, average)
pretty sure i did this. will have to see once i actually do my ds budget book.

34. go to the beach at least 3 times
i went once and got stung by a jellyfish 30 seconds into the water. :( unless a sudden okinawa or southern japan trip happens in the next 3 months, no more beach for me.

35. have a pumpkin carving party
this is in the works...

36. host thanksgiving
this is in motion too, but i think Style and his girlfriend are going to be hosting - feel slightly "oh, i thought it was gonna be at my place" sad/replaced but will settle for just attending and taking a couple dishes, especially if it means i don't have to put my hand in the raw turkey again. (could easily not do that ever ever ever ever again.)

things i love thursday

another friday edition.



.course dinners on someone else's dime.
.organizing at work, making life easier.
.this new cd we got at work (esp track 2).
.dried cherries by the handful.
.long skirts in cool weather.
.finally getting paid for overtime.
.poptarts and captain crunch (!!!).
.daydreaming of family visits (X2 in 2012).
.friends that know you from way back when.

things i love thursday

another friday edition.



.pizza.
.the majority of my coworkers.
.drinks and laughter.
.cereal.
.talking dresses with future sister-in-law.
.sleeping past 7:30am.
."i'm sorry" in cake and pie form.
.making art with little kids.
.hugging those little kids.

things i love thursday

.ムヒ (see "healing thus very itchy jellyfish sting").
.coworker sick = covering classes = MORE MONEY.
.snowcones.
.new DVDs.
.drinking with old high school friends.
.raisin bran.
.despite being overworked, work is fun.
.my new hiking backpack.
.feeling (strangely? unusually?) optimistic.

an anniversary of sorts

i moved to japan 5 years ago today.











huh.

roses and thorns

for the amount of time
i've spent online
in the last 7 days,
you'd think i'd have
about 28 blog posts.

i have 3.

and that's *counting* this one.

i can only seem
to pull it together
long enough to make lists.

so lists it will be.

but let's start with the thorns (so we can end with the roses):

● fighting. multiple times.
● getting stung by a jellyfish. ouchouchouch.
● some serious heat.
● a cancelled onsen trip (see first thorn and read: result).
● news that'll make work [even more] stressful for another couple months.
● feeling jealous of coworkers' summer trips seen via facebook.
● some serious 筋肉痛 (wink wink) the day BEFORE going back to work (sigh).
● no motivation to do ANYthing.

but more importantly, let's talk about the roses:

● a relaxing hair salon experience (and hello blond-er!).
● a new swimsuit debut at the beach.
● a trip to costco.
● new dresses.
● cheap jewelry too.
● finally getting caught up with work stuff.
● movies (transformers and tree of life).
● a clean living room and kitchen (see thorn #1 and read: another result).
● yokohama fireworks on my picnic quilt.
● a[n actually] pleasant international relation meeting or two.
● a lot of sleep.
● a much needed gchat with best friend from college.
● LOTS of time doing "nothing" (read: blogs, facebook, pinterest, twitter and youtube).


so, yep, that was summer vacation 2011.

and it's official,
i've become really boring.

i'd like to make some
resolution to change that
or resolve to do things.
you know, fun things
and become at least
a little less
boring?

but i don't think that's gonna happen.
nah, don't hold your breath.

back to the grind tomorrow!

things i love thursday

.vacation.
.the beach.
.the air conditioner.
.new (blonder!) hair.
.retail therapy.
.going to the movies.
.bagels and cream cheese.
.lots and lots of sleep.
.these earrings.

iphone photo no. 2017

it should be photo no. 1135; i took some video on my iphone and
it pushed all the file numbers after that up into the two thousands.
oh well...still funny:

"flower sniffin
kitty pettin
baby kissin
corporate rock
whores"

have to wonder if they know what their shirts say...?

things i love thursday

.imagine dragons "it's time".
.having the house to myself.
.pinterest.
.pocari sweat.
.transformers, the movies.
.new nail polish from my mom.
.taking obento to work = relaxed break.
.putting out [some] good numbers at work.
.having the next 7(!!) days OFF.

things i love thursday

.you know i'm no good.
.sleeping 13 hours.
.cinnamon toast crunch.
.ビーノ(weird "chips" made from green peas)
.a good sale.
.reading my (really) old xanga/livejournal entries.
.caffe latte mt. rainier caramel & caramel.
.waking up at 8:30 and napping at 10:30.
.getting real mail.

at the ENT

i have lost my voice.  almost completely. at least it's not painful, but i like to talk, a lot, and not being able to talk is very very frustrating. especially when i feel fine otherwise.

my voice was bad yesterday morning, but i figured i only had one class, i'd just make it through and then go home as soon as possible.  just my luck, another girl called in sick, so i had to help cover her classes but i still left work as soon as i could and went about looking for an ear, nose and throat doc that met all of these requirements:

a. close to home (within walking or bike riding distance)
b. open past 6pm (it was already 5:45)
c. fairly modern (based on the existence and appearance of the clinic's website)

i ended up going here.

the place was on the "newer" end, but still probably hadn't had an interior update in over 10 years.  i can't figure out why hospitals and clinics in japan always feel so *not* up to date.  it's not like they couldn't give things a fresh coat of paint or reupholster the waiting room seats in something a little less tacky. ha.

anyway, there was no one there, so i filled out the standard name, age, address, symptoms form and waited for a couple minutes before they called my name.

japan has, apparently, nothing even remotely close to HIPAA. while the amount of HIPAA paperwork and red tape i went through when i was in the states getting my tonsils out was a little much, i kind of LIKE the fact that no one knows why i'm in the waiting room.  that when the pharmacist gives me a prescription, she doesn't explain right then and there what each drug does, so that everyone in the pharamacy can hear and now knows what symptoms i'm getting medicine for.  i like that there are walls and doors between exam rooms and that when i ask a question, i'm the only one that hears the answer.

but alas, this is japan.

luckily, there was no one there yesterday, so it wasn't really an issue.  though i thought it was weird that there were two nurses, one behind the doctor and one behind me, just standing there watching and listening and making me feel like some kind of weird specimen being examined.  oh well...

he did some looking in my throat and my nose and said i've got the beginning of a polyp on my vocal cords and the best case would be to not use my voice for a week.  um yeah, i'm a singing, dancing monkey and can't really just take off a week of work, but i guess if i don't have a voice, i don't really have a choice.

i don't have japanese health insurance, so every time i go to the doctor, i pay out of pocket (and then send my receipts to the insurance company for reimbursement) but it always throws the ladies at the counter for a loop.  they always looked shocked and say, "um...well, then you'll have to pay the full price, you know..." and it's like, well, i didn't expect you to give me a discount or anything!  it was only about $30, which is cheap compared to what it'd be in the states!  and i think half of that was because i was a first time patient.

i left with two prescriptions, which were easily filled at the pharmacy right next door.  again, there was no one there, so even though she gave a detailed explanation of my meds, Ro and i were the only ones to hear it.  another $40 and we were out within minutes.

we rode our bikes home.  though not before i had a tiny mini melt down (aka tiredness and stress and sadness about yet another throat issue, coming out in the form of tears) outside the doctor's office.  it was fixed with a hug and a "it's gonna be okay" from Ro.

i hope he's right.

i've taken 4 doses so far (3 pills 3 times a day) and hardly spoken at all today but my voice is not even a fraction of a bit better.

still holding out on the medicine to kick in, but overall, it was one of my more "pleasant" doctor's office experiences, and since my throat just seems to be the root of one problem after another, i imagine having a "regular" ENT doctor might be kind of handy.  i'd go back.  i'd like to think i won't need to, but i probably will.  so yeah, i've bookmarked the website.

but really...when did i get so sickly?  and when will i get better? :(

the 2011 list: july

9. continue ds budget book
haven't done july yet, but i'm still sort of hanging on.

14. wear a dress or skirt 4 times a month
another month of skirts! though i did wear jeans once and shorts probably half a dozen times.

22. try a new recipe at least once a month
i don't think i did, but Ro may have.

24. swim laps at the gym at least twice a week (post move)
since quitting the gym in may, i was going to make yoga on fridays a routine, but then i got sick. and then 2 weeks later got sick again. maybe there's hope for august?

30. save money (starting goal of 60,000yen per month, average)
being gone for three weeks hurt the pay check this time around, and i don't know if i hit 600, but i'll see when i do my DS budgeting.


this month was a huge huge fail.
my list is just all "blaaah" when i look at it.
i may have to revamp.
yeah, maybe in august.

summer cold part two

i may or may not have a sinus infection. (judging by the color and consistency of the result of one serious nose blowing session i had this afternoon. it was disgustingly satisfying and left me feeling very un-stuffed.)

yep, you read that right; i'm sick again. or, as i like to believe, getting over being sick, again.

the sore throat (it always starts with you, doesn't it?!) started on thursday afternoon, followed by a likely fever (i was freezing but i know it wasn't a cool evening) and a most painful headache.

i'm willing to bet it was a result of this combination, in no particular order:
a) sleep severely lacking both quality and quantity (for the last couple weeks)
b) emotional drainage on the home-front
c) working over 45 hours (which is a lot, especially since it's not just an office job)
d) the oppressive heat
and
e) resulting lack of appetite

yesterday i drug myself out of bed because i had a "play date" at a friend's. she fed me lunch and delicious cookies and i played with her kids while we talked. it was the emotional charge i needed, but i fell asleep on the train home and completely crashed in bed for a couple hours.

i slept for over 12 hours last night. followed by at least an hour lying in bed before actually getting "up." earplugs and block-out curtains are a sick girl's best friend.

i have done close to absolutely nothing today, unless you count starting several new words-with-friends games and chewing all my fingernails down to the stubs. back to square one with those suckers.

i also read some interesting articles/blogs online, watched some pretty horrendous stuff on tv (they even warned that "the following video includes gruesome footage and is not advised for small children") from farms inside the exclusion zone in fukushima and listened to amy whinehouse's "you know i'm no good" numerous times on youtube.

i still have a little bit of medicine-head going on, even though i haven't taken any medicine (hello sinus congestion, i see you're still there afterall...?) and not looking forward to another work week starting tomorrow. there's a lot going on at work (and by "a lot" i mostly mean a lot of unpaid overtime) but i'm going to really try to make myself leave on time this week.

i really can't afford (mentally) to get sick at the end of every week. i want to go out and DO THINGS or even stay home but actually have energy to DO THINGS. plus, i'm climbing mt. fuji next weekend (yay, i can't wait!) and need to be in tip top shape. i can't imagine what the altitude would do to the already present pressure in my head.

ready or not, here comes another week...

things i love thursday

late, again.



.the faint smell of chlorine.
.banana muffins.
.cold cherry coke.
.ravioli and tomatoes in olive oil.
.high satisfaction (aka very visible result) cleaning.
.play dates.
.getting mail.
.new clothes.
.afternoon naps.

untitled

normally, in situations like these,
i listen to ani loud and on repeat.
and give a big eff you to the world.

this time, i'm even too sad for ani.
old (bad) coping mechanisms
seem appealing yet ridiculous.

no real worries though,
i can't see past my tears
to actually do anything else.

and the tears will eventually stop.
...i hope.

lay-zee.

it's official, left to my own devices, i am a lazy slob.

Ro is out of the house for a couple days (wed-sat) and i have no motivation to cook, clean or even close the closet doors (which are currently wiiiide open. it wouldn't really be a problem, except that our closets run along one whole wall in the living room, so it's not like they are hidden in the bedroom or anything...)

i don't remember what i ate on wednesday for dinner. i got home really late and think i might have had a bowl of cereal, though. and i went out to eat with a coworker yesterday. tonight, i attempted to make bow-tie pasta with pesto sauce (from a JAR!) and it was awful. i threw the whole batch in the trash. really, who messes up pasta? out of a jar?! can i blame it on the pesto sauce?

i missed cans and bottles day yesterday, even though i was up and out of the house by 8:30, but did manage to get burnable trash out today, on my day off!

i took my friend's almost-3-year-old kid out in tokyo for a total of four hours today and came home and crashed hard on the couch for two hours. it was a ton of fun (and super weird to be called "okaasan" by some guys who offered me a seat on the train) but i don't know how moms in tokyo do it. very impressive.

needless to say, i'm feeling a little bit like a failure so, my goals for the next (little less than) 24 hours, in order of NEED TO GET DONE, ESP. BEFORE RO GETS HOME are:

finish up some stuff for work
clean the shower and bathroom sink drains
wash (all) the dishes
vacuum
do a load of laundry
make dinner
make banana muffins


i know, lofty, right?

single singleton revisited

i wrote this post just over two years ago and here's the updated version:

1: married 8 months after college graduation.
  ---> bought a house and has a baby on the way.

2: married 13 months after college graduation.
  ---> from somewhere in pennsylvania to baltimore to kansas city, husband in grad school.

3: married 14 months after college graduation.
  --->  she hasn't changed in 5 years.  also said baby is not even on the to do list right now.

4: just got engaged. (found out on facebook no less...)
  ---> baby news wouldn't surprise me. (and maybe i'll find out via facebook?)

5: living with her boyfriend of about 6 months.
  ---> just emailed me; she said YES. (!!!)

6: still with her college boyfriend (judging from recent facebook photos)
  ---> still dating said boyfriend but so antsy for a ring.

as for number 7?

i am fairly content with my living-together-boyfriend situation but sometimes wish circumstances didn't leave me where i am.  (which, truth be told, can be taken in a number of different, and not incorrect, ways...)

things i love thursday

.peanut butter captain crunch.
.art with kids.
.ordering in (pizza!).
.cool evenings after hot days.
.cold rain.
.tingling shampoo.
.all these outfits.
.waking up with the sun.
.warm blankets on cold (!!) mornings.

things i love thursday

i even made most of the list ahead of time and *still* couldn't get it out yesterday...



.unlimited snowcones.
.friday night yoga and sauna.
.multiple desserts.
.being inspired by cool graffiti.
.somewhat sudden sense of pride at work.
.cold showers.
.play-doh.
.gari-gari-kun nashi flavor.
.caramel popcorn.

wordless wednesday

on hold and holding on.

i have had this blank post page open for at *least* 45 minutes.

and this is all i got.







well, and that i'm feeling better

though still slightly under the weather.

Ro is gonna be home in 10 minutes.

work is busy but in a really good way.

and i'm feeling restless or something.

like i want to *do* something, but don't know

how or where or what or there's just

a lot of inspired thoughts but no action.



i'll hold on a little bit longer and hope.

納豆の日*

i am sick.  yes, i know, again.
it started like it always does,
with a sore throat.  (seriously throat?)
but today, two days later,
it's a pure head cold.
the infamous "natsu kaze"

Ro left last night for iwate
for a couple days of volunteering.
there was a big earthquake this morning
and they headed for higher ground.
sat for two hours, but were okay.

i happened to watch nhk's
sign language "lesson" on tv tonight.
i might even go buy the text
or at least try to watch every week.
not that it would be useful,
just something to learn.

last week Ro and i went to yoga
at a place close to yokohama station.
i really liked the teacher
and for 2500yen, you get access
to the onsen, sauna & relaxation room too.
i bought a cheap yoga mat
and it's my new friday night routine.

apparently the rainy season
is officially over.
i don't remember a lot of rain.
but maybe the oppressive heat
has just made me forget?
i don't know how i'm
going to survive the summer
because it's only gonna get hotter.

there's no point to this post.
i figured i just needed to post something
something to get back to posting.
i used to have so much to say.
i hope i haven't become
a boring person
with nothing to say anymore...
i just need to start typing again, i guess.


*i didn't actually eat any natto today because i don't like it.  :P

the 2011 list: may & june

6. climb mt. fuji

have plans to climb august 5-6th and also again on august 27th.  hoping for at least one sunrise.

9. continue ds budget book

check.

10. go one week without going to the conbini (longer, if possible)

there's a grocery store right by work, which i pretty much use like a conbini, but i have definitely cut back on my conbini-ing.

12. make weekly meal plans and shop accordingly for 10 weeks (not consecutive OK) 5/10

i worked late a lot (and was gone for 3 weeks) and Ro was pretty much in charge of the menu, but i think we did this a week or two in may and june. 

14. wear a dress or skirt 4 times a month

may was probably a close call, but since getting back in mid-june, i have probably only worn shorts 4 times.  skirts skirts and more skirts!  :)

22. try a new recipe at least once a month

done, but probably by Ro.

24. swim laps at the gym at least twice a week (post move)

i never went to the gym and it wasn't worth the money, so i quit at the end of may.  i went to yoga with Ro at the end of June and plan to continue (just once a week).  

25. make a photo book in time to give Ro for our 2 year anniversary

fail.  i bought him a jacket that he wanted from north face when i was home in the states instead.  maybe next year?

30. save money (starting goal of 60,000yen per month, average)

i don't know exactly how much i saved each month, but i know i only had 10,000yen in my bank account in mid march, so doing the math, i've saved more than 60,000 a month since then.  yay.  :)

31. save up for and buy a new computer (may affect no. 30)

i bought a new computer while home in june.  (and i used money from my american bank account so as not to affect no. 30...sneaky i know)

things i love thursday

.spontaneous dinner guests.
.hosting parties.
.snowcones every day.
.simultaneous google doc-ing.
.a smooth class (great kids!).
.perfectly cooked scrambled eggs.
.fresh (and cheap) cherries.
.tanabata displays along the sidewalk.
.wintergreen lifesavers.

wordless wednesday

things i love thursday

.skirts and sandals every day.
.homemade ume jam.
.making doughnuts.
.leaving work before train rush hour.
.more good meals from Ro.
.japanese energy drinks.
.cute summer nightgowns.
.airconditioning(!!!).
.gummy bears and jelly beans.

summer 2011

click here for the details.

p.s.
some of the items are the actual items
 that i own, others were just the closest
looking things i could find on polyvore.
(i'm talking about paying over $100 for
some fabric to wrap around your neck. i
bought 3 meters of light-weight knit
stripedfabric at the fabric store
for 300yen and cut it. ;) )

p.p.s.
i can't believe i just spent 2 hours doing this. ha!

things i love thursday

[yes, yet] another thursday passed...



.getting back into a [work] rhythm.
.the perfect "full" at dinner.
.Ro's cooking.
.flowers!!!.
.country time pink lemonade.
.new [screaming of summer] dresses.
.ikea hot dogs.
.new plants.
.opening all the windows in the house.

two years.

and just like that, here we are.  wow.

so, maybe you've noticed, but Ro seems to be
hit and miss with anniversary type stuff--

last year birthday: HIT
one year anniversary: MISS
this year birthday: MISS

so i figured since he already made dinner reservations for thursday night,

i shouldn't expect anything like (*gasp*) flowers,

and even joked at work today about not expecting anything too romantic,

but after a me-initiated yakiniku dinner, i came home to...

!!!

so now i'm thinking maybe he only has it in him

to get it "right" once a year...?


love him either way<3
(but flowers are really nice)

things i love thursday

another thursday passed...



.Ro.
.also that he loved the jacket i bought for him.
.queen-size flat sheets (finally!).
.a fat summer bonus (totally unexpected!!).
.getting back to "my" kids at work.
.tylenol (still bffs).
.[lots of] new cute shoes.
.old fashion licorice.
.my dad (i adore him...and it's father's day<3).

on leaving

i leave

in five hours

to go back

to japan.

i'm gonna cry

like a baby.

i'm so

bad

at saying

goodbye.

tonsillectomy time

i've been in ohio for a little over two weeks.  but i haven't done much:
i had surgery early last week and have been recovering* since.


day 1
surgery at noon, home by 3 or 4, out of it from anesthesia and blissfully unaware.

day 2
trying to swallow liquid vicodin and out for the count on the couch.

day 3
bring on the "real" pain, and the fever and the chills and the puking at night.  switch to percocet.

day 4
day three revisted.  earaches also start.  eating: watermelon, jello and diluted apple juice.

day 5
flu-y feeling is gone, but the pain is almost unbearable.  nurse mom is out of town for the night.

day 6
day five revisited.  getting so hungry but can't eat much or well. more of the same plus mac&cheese!

day 7
tried to eat a normal dinner, dizzy on percocet, more middle-of-the-night making out with the toilet (x2).

day 8
i forget.  not bad enough to remember, or blocked out? stopped the Rx pain killers for tylenol.

day 9
post-op appointment = all good news**, went grocery shopping then had a three hour nap.  ate cereal!

day 10
i got my hair done*** and finally felt a bit normal. mornings still hard. eating: soft, but normal, food.

day 11
went to the mall**** and ate an almost normal dinner. pain helps remind me i still need to take it easy.

day 12
today.  mornings still painful. up at night for tylenol. now it just feels like a bad***** sore throat.

+edit+
day 12 part two
mostly normal dinner, sans alcohol. at night, scab came off, spit blood for 5 minutes = totally unnerved.

day 13
mornings [still] suck. made house visit to doc re: bleeding, says i'm 90% healed and okay for going back.
+end edit+


so, that's that.  no more tonsils for me!

another week or so of soft foods (no chips or crackers or things with sharp edges) and lots of fluids.  another week or two after that of tightness in my throat. then i should be good to go. it doesn't guarantee no sore throats, but it should decrease their frequency and the need for antibiotics, which was about five or six times a year. so yay, the worst is over. (thank god).


*sleeping, puking, eating jello, taking narcotics, popping tylenol, drooling, doing pretty much nothing.

**in the doctor's office
doc: have you been throwing up? (one of his first questions...oh, he knew...)
me: um yeah, you could say that.

doc: the good news is, you never have to do it again.
me: good, because i don't think i'd sign up for it again.

doc: let's have a look.
doc: well, everything looks good.  you might even be ahead of schedule.

me: it feels like there's something stuck in my throat.
doc: that's because there is; your uvula is about 3 times the size it should be...
me: is that normal?
doc: well, your tonsils were so big that i had to make the incision close to your uvula.  and then throw some acid on there...
me: so, it's pissed.
doc: yeah, pretty much.

***light brown went to very much blonde. actually, very blonde highlights in some natural red that came through. :)

****sur la table, anthropologie, north face, lululemon...i am a lucky girl.

*****my pain scale seems to have been skewed considerably and unnaturally.  what i have now would still keep me home from work, but it feels like NOTHING compared to the last week and a half.

things i love thursday

.prescription pain killers.
.my family's dogs (hysterically funny).
.fresh asparagus.
.my new computer(!!!).
.finally sleeping through the night.
.grapes.
.fruit snacks.
.a little mall splurging.
.going blonde (oh, i did).

キラキラ take twelve

done at the end of may:

things i love thursday

may 26th



.[pleasant] bank account surprises.
.retail therapy.
.wearing my long skirt experiment out.
.cereal for breakfast.
.sleepy Ro in the morning.
.soup from scratch.
.duty-free shopping.
.no line at check-in or immigration.
.sitting next to nice people on long flights.



june 2nd



.the hospitality tent.
.meeting friends at breakfast in the dining hall.
.dancing with abandon.
.staying up late.
.walking home in the middle of the night.
."squirreling" across the street.
.the bookstore.
.sun, skirts and smiles.
.driving ohio rural roads.

after midnight ☆s

☆ i sit at my computer about once a week now.  usually for work related internet-ting, doing my things i love thursday posts, or the rare long email typing.  i just finished stuff for work tomorrow (at 12:45am) but i will be kicking myself tomorrow morning for staying up even longer to blog. 

☆ speaking of work, i worked 165 hours last month.  it's months like that that i'm thankful i get paid hourly; that's one nice paycheck. 

☆ Ro has been sick for three days now.  that makes yours truly the sole cook, dish washer and garbage collector.  it's like living alone (as in, um, have to do everything yourself), except you can't just have toast and yogurt for dinner because someone else is depending on you making something nutritious.  oh, guess it's like having kids!  ha!

☆ i leave thursday noon-ish to go home to ohio.  i have a suitcase lying open on the floor with some things haphazardly thrown in it.  probably should get on that here soon.

☆ read two recent articles on a trendy fashion website that left me thinking, "whoa, i am way ahead of that trend!"  not that i am anywhere near fashionista status (hello jeans, t-shirts and my trusty pink converse everyday) but the articles were about things i've had, or been doing, for over a year.  hmm, just a trendsetter born a year too early?  nah, didn't think so either.  we'll call it living in japan.

☆ i got my legs waxed on saturday (hurt like a bitch!) and my nails done on sunday (we've got some serious sparkles and stars too!  ...photos to come) and am feeling quite maintenance-d for my trip home.  :P

☆ i recently discovered the keyboard shortcut to switch from english to japanese input on my mac.  until now, i've always gone with my mouse and manually clicked the american flag on my menu bar and then selected the hiragana あ every time i wanted to type japanese, and vice versa, (which was a huge pain in the ass).  well, no longer!  open apple + space.  switches between english and japanese like a dream!  ah, the little things in life.

'night.

キラキラ take eleven

since i'm getting my nails redone tomorrow, i figured it was probably about time i got this photo (taken 4 weeks ago) up:

two fingers on my left hand are very pale purple and have holographic flowers with yellow gem stone centers.  all other fingers are the darker shade of purple.

the last five years

may 20...


2006
college graduation. 
planning to move to tokyo in the fall.

2007
working as a middle school english teacher. 
living in tokyo, commuting to saitama,
getting into trouble on the weekends.

2008
still working in middle school, but starting to rethink job.
still living in tokyo and still crushing on boys left and right.

2009
unemployed and loving it.  living in tokyo.
more or less given up on boys.  sewing and studying instead.
thinking about 1kyu and a second summer on mt fuji.

2010
working with little kids.
lots of singing, dancing, playing and laughing. 
been with Ro almost a year.

2011
still working with little kids and
becoming more sempai than kohai.
living with Ro in yokohama. 


whoa.

things i love thursday

the only thing i can seem to blog with any kind of consistency right now, and late at that...



.costco (bagels, cereal, american grapes and more!!).
.(now less than) one week until i'm in ohio.
.more dinners by Ro.
.toasted peanut butter and jelly sandwiches.
.ants on a log.
.hints at a 2nd anniversary dinner.
.scheming to buy presents for Ro.
.college reunion next weekend.
.iTunes on shuffle.

things i love thursday

i don't think it's thursday anywhere, anymore, but here's goes...



.muji jelly beans.
.inarizushi.
.glass stars in my kitchen window.
.steak dinner, on Ro's dad's tab.
.cheap material turned spring scarf.
.fabric shopping.
.peanut M&Ms.
.rain boots and polka dot umbrellas.
.folding laundry.

things i love thursday

.that Ro chooses to watch figure skating.
.squirming around (alone) in bed before getting up.
.baked spaghetti and meatballs.
.having friends over.
.having absolutely nothing on the "must do today" list.
.(making and eating) cupcakes.
.a good ol' american style hamburger.
.retail therapy.
.making (potentially) new friends.

the 2011 list: april

5. have a photo shoot with professional photographers
april 23rd. can't wait to see the photos!!

8. travel to a new place in japan
for another point: lake okutama, in western tokyo. we went to this onsen while there, too.

9. continue ds budget book
check.

12. make weekly meal plans and shop accordingly for 10 weeks (not consecutive OK)
week three done. it was not as "successful" as the first two, though there were a couple good dishes here and there. i wrote about the first week and part of week two here.  3/10.

14. wear a dress or skirt 4 times a month
squeeked in with 4 for 4.

18. finish wave quilt
i can't find it. the top is finished...somewhere.

22. try a new recipe at least once a month
sure did.  and you can find what's going on in the kitchen here.

24. swim laps at the gym at least twice a week (post move)
i haven't been to the gym in 2 months. i need to make myself go so i'm not throwing away money every month.

25. make a photo book in time to give Ro for our 2 year anniversary
gotta get on this. on my golden week to-do list.

29. move AND send out "new address" postcards
finally sent! should probably send out some english ones to family and friends back home...

30. save money (starting goal of 60,000yen per month, average)
this happened for the second month in a row. feeling good but shortened work hours and less pay in the coming months threatens my momentum.

31. save up for and buy a new computer (may affect no. 29)
i will be heading home sooner than expected (end of may). might make an "impulse" buy.

32. backup my current computer before it dies
transferred all my 2009 and 2010 photos to my external hard drive. a step in the right direction.

33. organize a hanami party
had neither the time or energy for it this year. not to mention the "hanami jishuku" debate...

things i love thursday

.salt caramels.
.new flowers.
.NINE days off.
.reorganizing.
.little kids' laughter.
.waking up before my alarm.
.long days = big paycheck.
.coming home to dinner ready.
.ohio in less than a month.

quote of the day

"There is always something to be happy about. Truly happy.

And if you have the audacity to find it and the courage to make it your focus, in spite of the countless temptations to do otherwise, you will have learned well, your life will be transformed, and all things will be added unto you."

- the Universe

things i love thursday

.my new (polka dot) bag.
."vacation" coming up.
.light(er) workload days = energy in the evening.
.nerds (the candy).
.surprising Ro.
.getting back to organized at work.
.art with little kids.
.getting my money's worth out of my train teiki.
.haagen dazs ice cream.