maybe i had a bit to get off my chest

i got an interesting email today.

when i quit my teaching job, it didn't mean i cut ties with the school completely. i still visit. i helped out with their summer english program for two weeks in july. i go out for dinner and drinks with my favorite coworkers.

when i quit, they contacted the agency that they normally use for native english speakers and hired a young woman from the US (originally from jamaica?). i met her once or twice and i see her when i visit, but since we never worked together or have any real "connection", it's never been more than polite small talk.

i hear from the coworkers i have dinner with now and then that she is doing alright teaching wise, but that she's having trouble knowing how to get along with a particular coworker. when i hear that, i just knowingly laugh, because i remember how difficult he was to work with (interestingly enough, i never ranted about him here, despite having PLENTY of material.) and i feel a slight pang of sympathy for her as well as feeling total relief from not having to deal with it anymore.

so, she emailed me today.

"...the problem is that I feel very uncomfortable with what he does (or should I say 'doesn't do') at school. Today he didn't come to work because of some emergency with his friend he claims, but there is a debate tournament today....Monday morning he was supposed to come in early to help out the students with the debate, but "forgot"-- so it doesn't even look like he tries or cares or takes work seriously. It's hard to feel sorry or even believe him if and when he says something "comes up".

The same thing happened last semester about the final exam...He waited and waited till the last minute...We scheduled a time where we would have sufficient time to edit and
then he said he wants to go home early to put his futon out. hahaha ...Why does the school tolerate this lax behavior? I wonder who I can speak to about this and how....?"

and it occurred to me just how much i easily forgave. how much i sucked it up when he didn't come into work and i (or the other native english teacher) covered for his classes. how much he irritated me with his complaining and excuses. how much his attitude drove me crazy. but how much i just did it all, essentially, for him. how much i let him get away with.

and i don't know why the school puts up with such lax behavior. he's been at the school for 10 years or so now, and despite seeing a handful of hardworking teachers (ahem) come in and also leave, the school hasn't done anything about his slacking. maybe they think the two are completely unrelated? maybe they don't know what to do either, but by ignoring it, it's only getting worse for the other native speakers and for the japanese teachers who are pretty inconvenienced by his computer/microwave usage, unwillingness to take on ANY responsibility or actually come through once in awhile and his overall unapproachable attitude.

he always says, "but i don't understand japanese..." well, it wouldn't hurt to TRY, punk! he can do the basics, but only when forced. in all other situations he claims he can't understand or chooses english, expecting someone will translate any important information to the right people. the teachers where i worked didn't go out during the week or even on fridays like the "typical" salaryman, but every couple months we'd go out for dinner and drinks, or after the sports festival or after seeing the kids off after a field trip, plus the school bonenkai, or the end of the school year party, all of which he declined or wiggled his way out of. the social scene might not be your thing, but news flash buddy: the bonenkai and end of the school year work parties aren't considered optional! suck it up and get your ass in gear. it wouldn't hurt to be a bit more friendly, to make small talk in the kitchenette (while you "bake" you bread for the first 10 minutes of the 35 minute lunch break and everyone waits for you, silently cursing themselves for getting in after you) or seem at least HALF interested in the other 20some people who you work with. they go out of their way for you, it wouldn't kill you to be a bit appreciative that they let you get away with doing as little as you do and still getting a bigger paycheck than them only because you've been there for 10 years, not because you work anywhere near as hard as them.

(wow i feel better now.)

and now i don't know what advice to give this girl. i feel bad that she's stuck in the same situation i was in (and with less japanese ability) and i don't want to see another person get so burnt out like i did. because i could speak japanese, a lot of the non english speaking teachers counted on me to translate for him or relay messages to him and the other native english teacher. in my naivety, i just accepted it as my lot. a lot of the time, i did things because i didn't want to count on someone and then get myself in a hole when they didn't come through or know what was going on. but it wears on you. it makes you wish YOU could call in sick and not feel guilty for bailing on your students and your coworkers.

i'm not sure my way of dealing with it (aka simply ignoring his laziness and i-don't-give-a-shit attitude as much as i could and just doing things myself) was all that healthy but at the same time, he doesn't care. he doesn't care if things don't work out. he doesn't get the "scolding" because he chooses not to speak japanese and pawns it off on someone who does. the one who can speak japanese gets the brunt of the scolding AND has to pass the message along to that someone who doesn't care. and then, if things do go badly and/or you get in "trouble", it's all on you. because they're already on their way home, to hang their futon out in the sun.



but really, what do i say to her??




on a slightly related note: i was out with my favorite coworkers on monday night for the first time in months. a bunch of them are coming to ohio over winter vacation!!! but, while we were out one of my favorite teachers, who was kind of like a mother to me, asked me if the above coworker got moved to the high school and the middle school needed another native english teacher, would i consider coming back. i told her it wouldn't be an easy decision, but if that were the case, i would THINK about it. but i don't think i would have to think too long because i'm pretty burnt out from teaching. i'm putting my feelers out into other waters, but it was kind of nice, none the less. i felt missed. and loved.